Getting Married and Staying Married

The Holy Gospel of the day inspired me to write something about the sacrament of marriage.

Being married with someone you really love is not merely a gift; it is a HOLY gift. And when I say “HOLY” for me it is dedicated and consecrated to God.

When I was young, I had this misconception between marriage and wedding. I thought that marriage and wedding are synonymous. Although they are related to each other, they are very much different in nature. While wedding refers to the ceremony, marriage refers to the relationship-a long term sharing of two lives.

The idea of wedding and getting married never fails to blow my mind. That dream of having sacred and sincere ceremony, exchanging of vows in front of God and all our loved ones, wonderful table setting, tall and unique wedding cake, and wearing the best dress of my life ever.

Fast forward.

Getting married: Expectations

  • Waking up in the morning with the person you love the most, morning talks before going to work, and breakfast in bed;
  • Exchanging sweet text messages while at work;
  • Being excited going home to see your husband/wife;
  • Having a baby soon;
  • Cooking food for dinner and eating together;
  • Late night drives and conversation;
  • Travelling the world;
  • And many more!!!!

Staying married: Reality

  • Most of your expectations will only happen during the first few months or first few years of your marriage or never at all;
  • You might have trouble on having a baby or you might find it hard to look after your kids;
  • No more money and time for long drives or travels;
  • Long and heavy fights:
  • And a lot of changes that will bring your marriage on the edge.

These are just few of our expectations and realities in married life.

Having expectations is not bad. It’s actually good because it might bring the best out of you to turn all those expectations into a reality. But always remember that expectations will not always become a reality and there are huge adjustments to be made.

When you marry someone, you did not promise him/her to make your dreams/expectations to happen in reality. What you have promised is to stay with that person even if things didn’t happen the way you want it to be. Staying married rather than just being married. And sometimes reality is better than your expectations because it all comes out natural from the both of you.

We always want to be true. But being FALSE this time might work for your married life

F- forgiveness. Marriage is not only made up of two good lovers, it also consist of two good forgivers

A- acceptance. Always accept your mistakes and shortcomings and always accept that changes might always come your way.

L- love. Always share God’s love to each other.

S- surrender. Surrender your worries to God.

E- embrace. Embrace each other’s strengths, flaws, and weaknesses.

“Always choose to be inlove with your spouse and never stop to look for ways to stay inlove.”

May God be Praised

“With all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.”

-Ephesians 4:2-3